But the jokes breakthrough wouldnt happen until a month later, at a professional low point, when Kreischer clipped the story and put it on his YouTube channel and Facebook page. Bert Kreischer (born November 3, 1972), nicknamed "The Machine",[2] is an American stand-up comedian, podcaster, reality television host and actor. And the cops were like, Hold on, arrest him! And I was like, Its not here, you idiot. Sold.' I feel like my style of standup is like this thing called the Angel's Share. Fast-living comic Bert Kreischer heads to a cabin for some self-care and invites his funny friends to join his quest to cleanse his mind, body and soul. We sat down and she unzipped her pants and she had what I remember as ten grand, five grand, in cash in a hidden fanny pack in her pants. The Machine was a story Kreischer would tell at parties, backstage, or in meetings for years, but hed never do it onstage. Aidan Kelley is a senior resource writer for Collider, as well as an independent filmmaker and lover of all things cinema. But it didnt make sense that my class wouldnt know, but that is when I found out. Unicorns arent real. And I went, Oh my God! Naturally, none of that happens. "Let me guess, you've invited some people up there, haven't you?" ', "He goes, 'That's the movie. [3][4] From the Rolling Stone article director Oliver Stone optioned the rights to Kreischer's life. Tom Sandoval and Ariana Madix have broken up after he allegedly cheated on her with Raquel Leviss. When he was working on his special Secret Time,he said he began "talking about my family no holds barred,"and revealed he had to "clear"his routines with them ahead of time. Hamill is reportedly playing an exaggerated version of Bert's father, Albert Kreischer. The comedian's wife (and mother of their two daughters), LeeAnn Kreischer, has her own podcast, the aptly titledWife of the Party. In an interview withHaute Living, Kreischer who is a producer on the project said he'd just seen a script. Kreischer will be doing stand-up again on tour starting this July. Club, Bert shared that he was less of a relationship guy and more of a "went to a bar, got drunk, and then hooked up" guy before LeeAnn entered into his life. Do not talk to them. When he ran for president of his college fraternity, he gave his campaign speech naked, declaring he"had nothing to hide. [9][15][34] While in New York Kreischer attended open mics hosted by TV producer DJ Nash that were also attended by the likes of Demetri Martin, Bobby Kelly and Jim Norton. I used to try to keep that in the story because I thought it was great. It wasnt written. FX series based on a segment he had done for. Filming began in Serbia in April 2021 through Balkanic Media. Dont party with them. Because I already knew that day. Do not hang out with them. So what I did is I mashed up that whole thing and just had the teacher introduce them as the Mafia. [14] Kreischer worked the door at the now-defunct Boston Comedy Club. Speak about that agenda. As the New York Post noted, Kreischer'sRolling Stone profilewasthe inspiration for the movie, although Kreischer insisted he had nothing to do with it and hadn't even seen it. Most post Ive seen of this photo are when Bert is referencing partying while going to Florida State. And while he may have built up a considerable fanbase, not everyone knows the fascinating history behind this talented and defiantly unorthodox performer. he pondered in horror. Fans of the stand-up comic were ecstatic to learn that Luke Skywalker himself, Mark Hamill (Star Wars), would be joining the project in a hysterical announcement video where Hamill was announcing his "top secret" project while Bert is drinking with his shirt off in the background. We go, You dont have to watch it if its not for you. That also applies to what we watch. By the way, in that special, Hannah Gadsby had one of my favorite jokes of the whole year when she said, When I was a kid growing up, I knew more facts about unicorns than I did homosexuals. Find ratings and reviews for the newest movie and TV shows. ", "That was my platform," he continued. With the recent uptick in the popularity of stand-up comedy, mainly thanks to it being more accessible than ever because of streaming, one of the biggest names to get popularized and celebrated is Bert Kreischer. During his career, the prolific actor inhabited an array of troubled characters. [4][17], Kreischer is known for performing stand-up comedy while shirtless. They are not to be our friends. I already knew what was going on. Thank you so much. Then they walked out of the room and they were like, Listen, and they were very clear: Do not speak to them. "I sold the movie because I went into a room and I was talking to this guy and he said, 'What movie would you want to make?'" But I started caring. Bert Kreischer I am the Machine #RazzleDazzle coming March 14 #TheMACHINEmovie coming May 25 All rights reserved. On this Wikipedia the language links are at the top of the page across from the article title. "I might have to take it!". Given Bert Kreischer's party-animal reputation and shirtless shenanigans, fans may be surprised to discover just how seriously he takeshis comedy career. 2.4M followers. Theyre off to the right. And the way it had set up is, we had already all got our rooms and their room was right next door to mine like literally next door to mine, and across the hall from the teacher who had been passing me through all my classes. Whats Next for Convicted Sex Criminals Harvey Weinstein and R. Kelly? Stand-up comedian Bert Kreischer is taking serious action with the release of his upcoming movie The Machine, based on his 2016 stand-up special of the same name. Thats kind of the norm of all my friends like, Hey, we found a kilo of marijuana on the beach. Kreischer declared that his preference lies with "comics like Janeane Garofalo who is very stream of conscious in an honest way. That doesn't stop the famed comedian, as after he's dropped off at the nearest urgent care, Kreischer lets audiences everywhere know that The Machine will be making its way exclusively in theaters on Thursday, May 25th, just before Memorial Day Weekend. On September 16, 2019, Legendary Entertainment acquired the rights to develop comedian Bert Kreischer's true story stand-up routine into a feature film adaptation following its viral success. I am sorry. The story of Bert Kreischer's drunkenly debauched college years should ring a bell for anyone who's seen the 2002 comedy National Lampoon's Van Wilder. Explaining why he never took legal action, Kreischer recalled the advice offered by comedy guru Barry Katz: "You can be the guy that sues and doesn't work, or you can be the guy that doesn't sue and works. I had nothing to do with it. In 1997, he was featured in an article in Rolling Stone while attending Florida State University. And I am the exact opposite. To find out more, keep on reading to discover the untold truth of Bert Kreischer. "I found that when Itake my shirt off, people wanna drink there was a period in college when I took my pants off, too. In 1997, he was featured in an article in Rolling Stone while attending Florida State University. Enter To Win A Pair Of Tickets To See Guns N Roses! As reported by Variety on Monday (September 16), Legendary Pictures has optioned the rights to bring Kreischer's story about joining the Russian mafia while on a class trip in the late-'90s. I remember this article very, very well. Appearing onJoe Rogan's podcast, Kreischer recountedthe strange saga of how he spawned Van Wilder. Get all of his tour dates here. After trying out that format for awhile, he'd "taped a bunch and couldn't get one that I liked. Kreischer unexpectedly formed a bond with the mobsters, saying the few words in Russian he actually knew, "I am the Machine". Menu. High quality Bert Kreischer Russia inspired Pillows & Cushions by independent artists and designers from around the world.All orders are custom made and most ship worldwide within 24 hours. I mean, so uncomfortable that it would make my blood boil. 13 Photos Action Comedy Bert's drunken past catches up with him 20 years down the road when he and his father are kidnapped by those Bert wronged 20 years ago while drunk on a college semester abroad in Russia. "I literally had to say to my daughters when I was doing the special, 'Hey, I need to stop this now or change this wording now, but I call you guys dumb as f**k in the special,'" Kreischer explained. Go to Bert's Facebook fan page. [9][10], Principal photography on the film began in Serbia in April 2021 through Balkanic Media. Organize, control, distribute and measure all of your digital content. On Vultures Good One podcast, Kreischer discusses The Machine, post-comedy, and more. [18][17][14][21] The story revolves around how he inadvertently helped the Russian mafia rob a train while on a college trip to Russia. I was the guy who, when youd sit at a party, theyd be like, Oh my God, did you hear about the time Bert shit on a pizza box? Or Did you hear about the time that Bert climbed to the top of the telephone pole and yelled, I have marijuana! and there were like a thousand kids? I stumbled upon these while reading the comments on the video, and saw where his classmate posted these and yet again confirmed the story is actually true. [4][5][6] Kevin Biegel and Scotty Landes wrote the film. 7:00 PM. Lets smoke it.. Collect, curate and comment on your files. [7] On May 5, 2021, Stephanie Kurtzuba was cast in the film. Kreischer is sent to the woods to detox but he brings friends. Bert Kreischer is a stand-up comedian, actor, writer and host who performs to sellout crowds across the country. "That was a game changer,"Kreischer said, admitting he "was going to actually retire that story before it went viral. During an interview withThe A.V. When I got into comedy, I was so obsessed with writing material that seemed like it fit in. I didnt want to be the guy doing something different. I don't go to class very much.' I didnt want people to know it. While donning nothing but a helmet, speedo, and roller skates, Kreischer is ready to leap out of a moving vehicle, before getting his foot stuck under the wheel of the car and allegedly breaking his toes. Dr. Drew loved it and said, Hey, why dont you come back the next night? And Dr. Drews like, Tell them about the time you robbed a train in Russia. I told it again. Hell. And I was like, Oh, I am definitely meeting these guys. And by the way, everyone in this Russian class were kids that were interested in learning Russian, if that makes any sense. I mean, she was my age, roughly. Which is an interesting pivot when you become a comedian, as a guy who never told his own story, but the stories were told about him. Go to TheMachine.Movie for updates about #THEMACHINEMOVIE Show more Show more Shop the Bert Kreischer. ", Kreischer relived that particular era in an interview with theNew York Post. As Kreischer tells it in his 2016 stand-up act, he unwittingly got involved with the Russian mafia while on a study-abroad trip in college. They went to a gay bar on their first date and had "a great time" together. If you look through the pictures, she's got captions for most of them explaining the context. Kreischer stole a pocket watch so sentimental to the then-legitimate businessman, it inspired the man to become the leader of a crime family the likes of which Russia had never seen, becoming feared and respected throughout the country. [5][6][7][8][9] He is slated to appear in The Machine, a comedy film based on his life.[10]. The film also stars Mark Hamill, Jess Gabor, Jimmy Tatro, Stephanie Kurtzuba and Mercedes De La Cruz. [16] In 2001 Kreischer also starred in a television pilot based on Nash's life titled Life With David J.[5]. And by the way, I feel like Im just sizzling down to why this story could have been so much better if I was a better comic when I started telling it. Literally across the hall from her and next door to me. Kreischer produces and hosts Bertcast, a weekly comedy podcast on the All Things Comedy network. Things took a weird turn when, as Kreischer described, the bear"grabs me by the ears, both paws, lifts me off the ground effortlessly, and starts trying to shake marshmallows out of my a**." Rogan didnt just suggest he tell it, he implored his listeners to demand it of Kreischer if they saw him live. He said his surgery was a success, but he needs time to heal before he can tour again. Its such a great movie moment, but in comedy, the one detail added to so much more. Even though the film is completely finished with filming and is currently in post-production, the movie's distributor, Legendary Entertainment, didn't announce a release schedule for The Machine when the trailer was released. The Machine is an upcoming American action comedy film directed by Peter Atencio inspired by the 2016 stand-up routine of the same name created by Bert Kreischer, who also stars as a fictionalized version of himself. The action-comedy is based on Bert Kreischer's viral stand-up story about his college trip to Russia. Just going through life, having fun, doing crazy stuff. [4] Kreischer has served as host of the television series Hurt Bert on FX as well as Bert the Conqueror and Trip Flip on Travel Channel. Set 23 years after the original story which inspired it, The Machine finds Bert (Kreischer) facing familial crisis and the arrival of his father (Hamill) when the ghost of his booze-soaked past. Privacy Policy and Currently, between Kreischers Facebook and YouTube, The Machine has over 70 million views, but that doesnt count the views across the many content aggregators who have reposted the clip. 2023 Vox Media, LLC. By what name was The Machine (2023) officially released in Canada in English? ", While others in his situation, eyeing graduation, were anxiously seeking job offers, Kreischer's anxiety was a bit different. Irina tells the story completely straight-faced, none of it being played for laughs (while also giving a brief tease of Mark Hamill's character) until we see the man that she's talking to is none other than Bert Kreischer, who comes to the realization that he is Irina's origin story. Breaking down the contenders in the seasons most unpredictable Oscar race. Oh, how right she is. "I slide out of his paws, land on my back, and that's the last thing I remember, because apparently his instincts took over and he sat on my face," he recalled. Dont make strangers laugh.. In October 2020, Bert Kreischer unveiled a new Netflix series,The Cabin. Eventually, "the development deal falls apart with Oliver Stone," so the writers working on scripts "get their intellectual property back," he explained. But that for me was All of a sudden, when the adventure started is when she did that. "What if they offer me this job?" I just kind of lived my life really oblivious, like a drunk Forrest Gump. Featuring him, Igor, Sasha, and some more people. This is the story about the time I robbed a train in Russia with the Russian Mafia.Go to TheMachine.Movie for updates about #THEMACHINEMOVIESUBSCRIBE so you never miss a video https://bit.ly/3DC1ICgFor all TOUR DATES: http://www.bertbertbert.comFully Loaded: https://fullyloadedfestival.com/ Something's Burning: https://bertyboyproductions.com/somethings-burning-season-1Merch: https://store.bertbertbert.com/Twitter: http://www.Twitter.com/bertkreischer Facebook: http://www.Facebook.com/BertKreischer Instagram: http://www.Instagram.com/bertkreischer YouTube: http://www.YouTube.com/user/AkreischerTikTok: http://www.TikTok.com/@bertkreischerText Me: https://my.community.com/bertkreischer#bertkreischer #themachine #russia Follow. [23] That same year one of his stories appeared on an episode of the animated Comedy Central series Shorties Watchin' Shorties. Check this link for the full crew credits. I'll get better. Jason Statham and Aubrey Plaza do not seem like a match made in action-comedy-chemistry heaven, but it somehow works. Let's do it!' Filming began in Serbia in April 2021 through Balkanic Media. Its such a great joke. Reddit and its partners use cookies and similar technologies to provide you with a better experience. According toDecider, Kreischer says in the first episode,"My lifestyle's catching up with me, and if I keep going like this, I'm gonna have a heart attack." I didnt want people to read it. Its at my house! I would enjoy it. This is the story about the time I robbed a train in Russia with the Russian Mafia. Which one are you? Mediocre. Tap into Getty Images' global scale, data-driven insights, and network of more than 340,000 creators to create content exclusively for your brand. Most of the lead cast members were hired from April to June 2021. Would She Like It?, All Hail Matt Rogers, the Prince of Christmas, Bert Kreischer, the Man Behind the Machine, Shania Twain Gives Rare Update on Her Ex-Husband and Ex-BFF, Journey Should Probably Go Their Separate Ways, The 7 Best Movies and TV Shows to Watch This Weekend, 6 Stand-ups Analyze ChatGPTs Attempts to Steal Their Jobs, How to Watch and Stream Every 2023 Oscar-Nominated Movie, Rick Scott Is Unfortunately Kind of Right About Novak Djokovic, Rick Scott Is Unfortunately Right About Novak Djokovic, Travis Barkers Finger Is Now the Enema of Blink-182 Fans. You had to be your own promoter, which I was instinctually uncomfortable with. Obviously, Bert Kreischer is the one who tells this story the best and there are plenty of clips online of him telling the story if you want to hear it for yourself, but here's a quick summary: It all started when Kreischer randomly picked a Russian language class while attending college. 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